I am a very talkative and open person who never meets a stranger. Jeff tends to be more of the "sit back and observe the situation" type before he really opens up.
I am a very structured person while Jeff tends to be more spur of the moment.
At times, I have a tendency to get carried away with stressful things while Jeff tends to be more laid back.
Our opposite characteristics really do help balance each other out for the better. He is the ying to my yang. When he needs it, I can rev him up and when I need it he can calm me down.
However, it never ceases to amaze me at how those "little things" can sometimes feel like the biggest hurdles ever! I am very organized and def have a hint of OCD (shocker) while Jeff tends to be more "carefree" with his hmm, how should I say it....."organzational skills"?! After a long day - when our differences cross paths with one another, we sometimes do not handle them as well as we should. At this point I can only speak for myself and let me tell you, in those moments, it feels as though the fact that his shoes are laying at the foot of the steps as opposed to in his closet, is the biggest drama ever. It crawls under my skin like you cannot even imagine. Come on, how can he leave his shoes there when he knows how much it gets to me?!
Then of course I have to say something about the shoes and all he hears (I feel very safe in assuming I am correct in this analysis) is me nagging him about something that is not important bc its not like he did it on purpose. It just makes sense to him that he would take the shoes upstairs the next time he goes as opposed to making a special trip now. It's all about the logistics!
As I have mentioned, we are working through a marriage series in our SS class at church. The chapter a few weeks ago was about "picking" on each other. For example - everything I just mentioned above....whoops! This was a great Sunday for the lesson considering we had been snapping at each other all morning while preparing for church. What is about Sunday mornings that causes that to happen?! This stuff happens in all marriages bc nothing is ever perfect and sometimes you just have "one of those days". However, lesson worked through the logic of how I am not trying to nag and he is not purposely trying to upset me - it is just the differences in how our brains work. We need to stop for a moment and revaluate if the drama and small issue is even worth it. The small stuff is our laws that we have made for ourselves and others, not God's laws. At the end of the day, God's laws are really all that matters and the rest is just pieces we can work through.
Our teacher then spoke about how he councils widows and widowers and there is one common topic they all share with him when speaking about losing their spouse. They talk about how they would give anything to have those "little" irritating tendencies around again. In my case, they would love to have those shoes sitting at the bottom of the stairs bc it would mean their husband was at home to leave them sitting there. For Jeff - they would love to have their wife nagging about towels on the floor bc it would mean she was still around to pick up the towels.
I just turned 33 a few weeks ago and in the grand scheme of things that is still fairly young, or at least that is what I keep telling myself. In the past 24 hours through mutual friends I have learned of an amazing young lady (2 years younger then me) who passed away from sickness and left behind her beautiful young family, a 34 year old husband with a young family battling sickness, and another individual whose spouse was just diagnosed. Point being - I bet they would love to have those nitpicking things to worry about now rather then this new chapter in their lives.
We are only here on earth for the blink of an eye before we spend eternity with our heavenly father in his Kingdom. It's better to not sweat the small stuff. Don't get me wrong - I AM A WORK IN PROGRESS every single day. However, I sure do love the person wearing the stinky smelly shoes!
Carpe Diem!
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